Death Denial refers to the human tendency to avoid thinking about or acknowledging the inevitability of death. It’s a psychological defense mechanism that helps individuals cope with existential anxiety and the fear of their own mortality. People often engage in death denial by distancing themselves from the concept of death, avoiding discussions about it, and seeking psychological comfort through various means.

Examples of how this law manifests.

Avoiding conversations about death. Many people avoid discussing topics related to death, such as writing a will, discussing end-of-life care preferences, or even attending funerals. This avoidance can stem from the discomfort and anxiety associated with facing the reality of mortality.

Euphemistic language. Society often uses euphemisms to soften the impact of death-related discussions. For instance, phrases like “passed away” or “in a better place” are used to avoid directly mentioning death.

Prolonging youth and appearance. The beauty and cosmetic industry thrives on the desire to maintain a youthful appearance. At least in some small way, this desire can be seen as a form of death denial, as it represents a refusal to fully accept the natural aging process and the changes that come with it.

Different cultures have developed diverse approaches to addressing the fear of death, with beliefs, rituals, and philosophies that shape their perspectives on mortality. I have been most impressed by two of these cultures: the Christian and Samurai cultures:

Christian Culture

In Christian culture, beliefs about death are often influenced by religious teachings that provide meaning to LIFE.

Many Christian denominations believe in an afterlife where individuals will be judged and rewarded or punished based on their beliefs and actions on Earth. This belief in an eternal life provides a sense of hope and purpose beyond death.

The central tenet of Christianity is the resurrection of Jesus Christ. This event represents victory over death and the promise of the resurrection of the body. Resurrection means that at some point all one who has died will becoming flesh again but with a big difference: he or she can no longer die.

Christian funerals often emphasize the hope of resurrection and reunion in the afterlife. Services typically include prayers, hymns, and readings from religious texts that offer solace to the grieving. Christian communities often rally around those who have lost loved ones, providing support and assistance during times of grief.

Many Christians emphasize the importance of spiritual preparation for death through prayer, repentance, and living a virtuous life. This helps them face death with a sense of readiness and faith.

Samurai Culture

The Samurai culture of feudal Japan was heavily influenced by Bushido, a code of conduct that emphasized honor, loyalty, and bravery, philosophical Zen Buddhism, and the Shinto religion. These influences helped Samurai approach the fear of death at all times and especially in battle.

Samurai were trained to accept the inevitability of death as an essential part of their warrior ethos. They believed that a Samurai’s true strength lay in the ability to face death fearlessly. The sakura or cherry blossom was their favorite icon, as it represented a flower that fell to the ground at the height of its beauty.

Bushido placed a strong emphasis on honor and loyalty. Samurai were expected to uphold their honor even in the face of death, and the fear of dishonor often outweighed the fear of death itself. Seppuku, or ritual suicide, was an expression of this hierarchy of priorities.

Samurai engaged in various forms of meditation (zazen) and mindfulness practices to cultivate mental discipline and calmness. This mental training helped them face life and death with equanimity.

The Samurai also had a strong belief in ancestral veneration, where they honored their ancestors through rituals and offerings. This practice provided a connection between the living and the dead.

Both Christian and Samurai cultures offer distinct ways of addressing the fear of death. While Christianity provides hope through resurrection and an afterlife, Samurai culture centers around acceptance, honor, and facing death as an integral part of life. These examples highlight how cultural beliefs and practices shape people’s perceptions of mortality and provide strategies for coping with the fear of death.

Here are some other ways of facing the fear of death.

Accept that death is a natural part of life. Open conversations about mortality can help normalize discussions about end-of-life plans and alleviate anxiety. Remember that dying has legal consequences that if not arranged in time will create serious problems for one’s family.

Explore your feelings about death and confront any anxieties you may have. Engaging with your fears can lead to a healthier perspective on mortality. I would recommend, however, that this not be done everyday so as not to develop into an obsession.

Recognize that awareness of your mortality can inspire you to make the most of your time and focus on what truly matters to you. My favorite lyrics on the subject:

E a coisa mais divina
Que há no mundo
É viver cada segundo
Como nunca mais

[The most divine thing in the world
Is to live every second
Like never again.]

Vinicius de Moraes, “Tomara” (1970)

Discussing death-related topics with loved ones can help break down barriers and foster understanding. It’s important to share your wishes and understand the wishes of others. Isn’t it interesting that we don’t like to talk about death yet we love to see it in films?

Professional help can assist in addressing death-related anxieties and provide tools to cope with existential fears.

Mindfulness techniques can help you stay present and appreciate the moments in life, which can mitigate anxiety about the unknown future.

Engage in personal development and self-reflection to foster a sense of purpose and fulfillment, reducing the impact of death denial. In other words, fear neither life nor death.

Different cultures and individuals approach the concept of death in various ways. While it’s common to experience death denial to some extent, finding a balance between acknowledging mortality and living a fulfilling life is key to managing this aspect of human nature.

(Q.C. 230828)